First Impression Does Not Matter
You are either solving problems or creating them
“… But I have heard it said of you that when you hear a dream, you can interpret it.” — Gen 41:15
What if I told you your idea about first impressions is all wrong?
News that Amazon approved the paperback of my book, Joy Has Come Home, got me reflecting on one of the lessons I outlined in the book and reminiscing about the launch event. The master of ceremony asked me –
“What is the first impression you want people to have of you?”
I jumped right to a point in my career where I applied the lesson. Here is the backstory the audience did not get to hear that day.
My parents experienced a lot more downs than ups during my high school years. Those downs sometimes meant one meal a day. At other times, I would have to soak my old shoes for them to fit for a few hours. I did handy work at construction sites to help save up for college.
But my college years were different for one thing — I was big enough to fit into dad’s clothes and shoes. The problem? Dad would never find them when he needed them.
His trousers and shirts will go “missing.” His shoes will be left unpolished, in a place other than where he left them. He squeezed the toothpaste from bottom to top, I do from the middle. I was always in trouble for not replacing things in their proper place. I was notorious to the point dad started calling me Mr Careless.
That is when the enforcer, mum, had had enough. A few selective hand movements to my body helped imprint her words in my memory. From then on, that lesson shaped how I do things — from how I squeeze my toothpaste to how I work and do business.
She said, “people will remember you for the problems you solve or the ones you create.”
You can’t let your dad keep shouting about the same mess all the time. It is not about the shouting, but the reputation you are building. Your reputation will define you, and Mr Careless is not a name you want to stick. In years to come, you must be mindful of how you want people to remember you. Do you want people to be happy hearing your name or celebrate seeing your back? Then she gave me the example of how Joseph’s reputation as a dream interpreter got him from prison to prominence.
You see, a good first impression is useless if it does not last. A lasting experience builds your reputation, and your reputation will open doors of opportunity for you.
“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” — Maya Angelou
In our world of pervasive social media, we have become more obsessed with looking good at first appearance than the quality of our connections. We organise our LinkedIn profile to attract the desired job or business opportunities. Businesses invest in aesthetically pleasing websites to create a positive perception with their target audience. Life will be more meaningful if we focus less on how we look and more on how we make people feel.
I suggest practising these six disciplines to help you go from making a good first impression to creating a lasting legacy.
1) Be clear about what legacy you want to create
2) Discover your purpose — your Why
3) Strive to be of service and not just to be a success
4) Follow your passion, not profit
5) Be a life-long learner
6) Always give your best
Order your paperback copy of my book from the link below for more about this lesson and five more.
Book recommendations
Here are two book recommendations on serving others and making a difference:
a) The Power of Serving Others: You Can Start Where You Are by Gary Morsch and Dean Nelson
b) Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl
Citations
Here are three quotes to encourage to you find your Why, make a difference and leave a legacy.
“The more one forgets himself — by giving himself to a cause to serve or another person to love — the more human he is.” — Viktor Frankl
“What you leave behind is not what is engraved in stone monuments, but what is woven into the lives of others.” — Pericles
“If you would not be forgotten as soon as you are dead, either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.” — Benjamin Franklin
