Dare To Compete
The differentiating trait of successful people
“Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong.” — 1 Cor 16:13
One of the ironies of living in Dubai is that we drive in our cars to get to a park to ride our bikes. Needing something to psyche me up after a tough six weeks layoff from the cycle, I tuned into Jay Shetty’s “On Purpose” podcast while driving to the cycling track for day two of a 30 by 30 challenge. As always, Jay was delivering an inspirational masterclass with his guest — Maya Shankar (my daughter’s namesake).
One comment from Maya resonated so strongly I had to replay it several times afterwards. She made me realise that other people do face anxious moments and feelings of insecurities. But self-awareness and the ability to deal with those anxieties and insecurities are what set successful people apart.
“Maybe I’m too afraid to do the thing I’ve been asking everybody else to do. Maybe, I don’t think I’m good enough. Maybe, I don’t know if I have what it takes.” — Hilary Clinton
That was Hilary’s reaction to a comment from a basketball player while she was courtside during a game. “Dare to compete, Mrs Clinton, dare to compete.” This point made me reflect on my recent experience getting back to the game of squash, which I had not played since I left Dar es Salaam in 2017.
When I briefly stopped cycling in September this year because I did not have a car, I found a squash court within 3KM of my house. So I signed up to have something to maintain my stamina. But my first call with the club manager on that Saturday was not what I expected. His immediate response to my enquiry was, “Oh you are in luck! We have one spot left in our beginners’ tournament this coming Friday.” What? I can’t play, I replied. I need a coach to start practising, and I do not intend to compete. I am doing this to keep fit. I could almost bet this guy was deaf because he then said, “you can come over to sign up with our coach when he returns from his vacation on Tuesday.” I will see the coach, but I will not be playing in the tournament. “See you on Tuesday.” Click.
On Tuesday, I got to the sports club in my running shoes, shorts, and a T-shirt to inquire about membership details. “Yes, I was expecting you,” the coach said after we exchanged pleasantries. What do you mean you kept my spot for the tournament? I told your colleague I would not be playing. “Some of the guys who will be playing at the tournament are on the court now. You can play a few games with them. Then we will have a training session on Wednesday to get you ready.” I turned to see whom he was talking to; “yes, you,” he said. Coach, I don’t have a racket, and these are not squash shoes. “No problem.” A few minutes later, the coach handed me a racket and directed me to a waiting opponent on the court.
In no time, I was panting like I had just finished a 100 meters sprint. I prefer not to let the scores distract you from the point of the story. So let’s move on. All I said some 20 minutes later was, water! Water! Water! Coach, I think I am going to faint. I can’t do this — no tournament for me. I could have been talking to you at this point. “Don’t worry; you will be fine. Just focus on participating. The first round is only five matches on best of three games each.”
All my excuses fell on deaf ears. So, I showed up on tournament day to find the coach did bring my racket and a pair of squash shoes as promised. Seven matches later, I lost the third-place play-off match. Almost a month after the tournament, I am still showing up at the squash courts, winning some and losing most.
Although I am back on my bike, I am not letting off on squash. The few weeks of getting back to the game and the experience of playing in that beginner’s tournament reinforced a few life lessons. And the most important is captured in the quote:
“You don’t have to be great to get started. But you have to get started to be great.” — Les Brown
I did not want to play because I was not ready to compete at any level, albeit amateur. The squash coach said to me, “you will not know your level until you play against others. Go give it your best shot.”
Are you thinking about writing a book, but you are afraid of what readers may say? Have you been holding back on that business idea because you are scared it will fail? Are you scared of applying for that job because you don’t think you have what it takes?
If you answered yes to any of those questions, or you the fear of failure has been holding you back to start something new, then read these words from Maya Shankar.
“We all have some degree of self-doubt. And, it’s just a matter of finding ways to manage that and learning from other people’s experiences.”
I dare you to compete. I dare you to give it your best shot.
Book recommendations
Here are two book recommendations that will inspire courage in you:
a) The Alchemist — by Paulo Coelho
b) The Last Lecture — by Randy Pausch
Citations
Here are three quotes to help you find the courage to start and avoid the fear of failure:
“Anything worth doing is worth doing badly until you get it right.” — Les Brown
“Don’t die with your music still in you.” — Dr Wayne Dyer
“Don’t give in to your fears. If you do, you won’t be able to talk to your heart.” — Paulo Coelho
